The Day Camp Incident: Strike 1
Sometimes you have to come out of your comfort zone and speak for your child.
August 4, 2016 | 12:46 AM
Ash (age 6) finally coming down from his sugar high
Bravery: The quality or state of having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty: the quality or state of being brave: COURAGE
I had to address a safety issue with the director of my son's day camp. Confrontation is something that does not come easily to me. Whenever Ash feels that his safety is a concern, my husband and I teach him to speak up for himself. Yet it can be scary for a child, especially a six-year-old child, to approach and express his / her concern to a grown up who's in an authoritative position. It can also be scary for an adult to approach and express their concern to a grown up who's in an authoritative position.
So what happened? Each week for about four weeks now there has been an area of concern regarding this Camp's supervision.
The Camp was going to a ball game. This would be Ash's first. The night before I bought him a team shirt so he'd fit in with the rest of the kids. The day of the game I packed him snacks and a sandwich in case he didn't want to eat ballpark food or was still hungry. A camp leader suggested I give him some cash for snacks.
I pick him up and he proudly tells me that he ate a big bag of Skittles, but didn't finish it because it spilled.
Me: "What else did you eat at the ballpark?"
Ash: "That's it."
Me: "That's it?!? You didn't eat a hot dog or pretzel or popcorn?"
Ash: "No, just Skittles. And mom, it was so big and I ate all the red ones!"
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My husband and I spoke about this and he suggested that I talk to a Camp Leader about what Ash told us.
Grant: "I can't imagine that they'd let him eat only candy and nothing else for six hours"
Me: "Right? The rule is usually eat your lunch first, then candy. He didn't spend the money I gave to the Camp Leaders for extra food- wait... where's his money?!?"
The next morning I spoke with a Camp Leader who was at the game. She asked Ash about the lunch situation and he repeated what he told me and Grant. She assured me that she would talk to the group leader he was with and get the money returned to me.
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UPDATE: Ash has no interest in attending baseball games. His Cub Scout Troop had an opportunity to watch fireworks on the field. Nope, not interested. He was invited to go to a game with a really good friend with all the hot dogs and peanuts he could eat. Nope, not interested. Ash responds with, “I’m good. Remember, the baseball incident at camp?”
What I learned
Advocate: This situation showed me how important it is to be an advocate for my child. No matter what my hang-ups may be about speaking up, if speaking up for Ash means giving him a voice, then my hang-ups can’t be my crutch. I have to be Ash’s voice because at 6 y.o., he’s only learning how to speak for himself.
Document: Document any incident that happens while your child is under the supervision of another person or agency. If another incident happens which makes me question entrusting Ash with this camp, then I have proof of previous acts of irresponsibility. It’s my hope that a situation like this wouldn’t happen again to Ash or any child.
Clear expectations: The next day I collected the $5 and spoke with the Camp Leader. I told her that on future field trips Ash cannot eat only candy for the whole day - he must have “real food” first. We’ll see what happens…